Why Books Are Better Than Drugs

Dana Stabenow

Excerpted from a handout given me by an Anchorage librarian a while back.

No one ever had to check into the Betty Ford Clinic for reading too much.

Nobody ever read too many books and then jumped off a building, walked through a plate-glass window, or mooned a cop.

You don’t have to flush all your books down the toilet when there’s an unexpected knock at the door.

It is extremely rare that anyone gets gunned to death in a book dispute.

Your friends won’t desert you when you run out of books.

You can read all you want it won’t show up on a urine test.

If you miss reading one day, you won’t go into painful withdrawal. [Dana sez: “Sez you.”]

No matter how many books you have, you can’t be charged with ‘intent to distribute.’

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